Mal was für Hunde/katzenliebhaber...leidernurinenglish

Dear Dogs and Cats,
>
> The dishes with the paw print are yours and contain your food. The
> other dishes are mine and contain my food. Please note, placing a
> paw print in the middle of my plate and food does not stake a claim
> for it becoming your food and dish, nor do I find that
> aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.
>
> The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack
> Beating me to the bottom is not the object. Tripping me doesn't
> help because I fall faster than you can run.
>
> I cannot buy anything bigger than a king sized bed. I am very sorry
> about this. Do not think I will continue sleeping on the couch to
> ensure your comfort. Dogs and cats can actually curl up in a ball
> when they sleep. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each
> other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. I also know
> that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the
> other end to maximize space is nothing but sarcasm..
>
> For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If
> by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut,
> it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob or
> get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must
> exit through the same door I entered. Also, I have been using the
> bathroom for years -- canine or feline attendance is not required.
>
> The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog or cat's
> butt. I cannot stress this enough!
>
> To pacify you, my dear pets, I have posted the following message on
> our front door:
>
> To All Non-Pet Owners Who Visit & Like to Complain About Our Pets:
>
> 1. They live here. You don't.
>
> 2. If you don't want their hair on your clothes, stay off the
> furniture. (That's why they call it 'fur'niture.)
>
> 3. I like my pets a lot better than I like most people.
>
> 4. To you, it's an animal. To me, he/she is an adopted son/daughter
> who is short, hairy, walks on all fours and doesn't speak clearly.
>
> Remember: In many ways, dogs and cats are better than kids because
> they:
>
> 1. Eat less
>
> 2. Don't ask for money all the time
>
> 3 Are easier to train
>
> 4. Normally come when called
>
> 5. Never ask to drive the car
>
> 6. Don't hang out with drug-using friends
>
> 7. Don't smoke or drink
>
> 8. Don't have to buy the latest fashions
>
> 9. Don't want to wear your clothes
>
> 10. Don't need a 'gazillion' dollars for college.
>
> And finally,
>
> 11. If they get pregnant, you can sell their children.
>

Danke Terrier, wir fühlen uns jetzt ertappt, Joschi und ich - zumindest teilweise...

Süüüüß

@ Admin
Cat in box - oder deutsch: Breitrückenflokati mit Wedelschwanz...

@ Terrier
did you join my life - me and my bloody dogs??

Smart - Yes, I did

Ich kann nich mitreden, weil: Isch habe gar keinen Hund...

...dafür hab ich aber eine liebe, hundevernarrte Kollegin, der gerade als Dritthund ein Berner Senn von einer Züchterin angetragen wurde...weil: mit dem darf sie wegen Verdacht (wohlgemerkt: Verdacht, nicht Diagnose) auf HD nicht züchten. Ist wohl ein netter Hund...

...falls irgendjemand also rein zufällig sowas brauchen kann...einfach ne PN schicken.

lg finchen